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Rules

I recently read a couple of posts pertaining to certain rules that people feel should be taken rather seriously when blogging on WordPress. It appears that views differ wildly as to the desired etiquette, and people can be both highly irritated and insulted if their own views are not followed. I found it interesting. And quite odd. In effect it seems like politics, but then gather more than one in any space, be it virtual or 3d, and some kind of rules will pop up.

Here are some of the ‘rules’ I came across;

1. You should not have any moderation for comments –  because the person leaving the comment does not know if said comment has reached its destination and may well try posting again, and this annoys them quite a lot (a most enjoyable fellow blogger of mine Doobster wrote a post on that very rule). My answer was as follows; “As to this – “So this comment is awaiting moderation business — just cut it out.” – it made me laugh a lot. How very demanding!! Ha! No sir. No! And why? For two reasons – firstly, I have been targeted upon the web in the past,stalked, and had to deal with some very, very unpleasant comments. It has led me to err on the side of caution and with good cause I can assure you. Secondly – I like to reply to the comments when I read them, not leave them hanging about with people popping back to see if I’ve answered, or if I’m going to answer, nor anything else mad folk get into when waiting for things to happen. Patience is the key. I’m having a conversation with someone when they comment, so I don’t leave them in mid air on my blog until I have time to join in. When the comment is posted…so is my answer. And I likes it that way Olive. laughs and blows a large raspberry his way” I’m afraid I also mooned from the Cloud too as I left. Not my finest hour that. Luckily the Doobster took my words well for he has a fine sense of humour, and he also has a talent for debate and is genuinely interested in why people disagree with him on many subjects. He has a great deal more patience than I (for debate at least), and, as he agrees, a much thicker skin. (Sonmi’s skin is so thin in comparison she is almost entirely transparent.)

2.  Comments should be listed in order of the oldest comment at the top, and the newest comment at the bottom. Or vice versa depending upon which rule you declare to be right.  – Myself and the cloud prefer the oldest at the top and the newest at the bottom, purely because that is how writing and conversation naturally flows, however, if you have several thousand followers, all of whom leave a comment, the mere act of scrolling all the way to the bottom can be off putting. Doing the opposite to that which I prefer will result in no killings.

3. If a comment is not grammatically correct, then much like the Balrog – it shall not pass –  I would not censor someone for spelling words wrong, or using all manner of language unless it be unpleasant in nature. I like to play with words, stretch the boundaries of grammatical rules and enjoy it when others do too. Of course there is a difference between knowing your grammar and then taking the abstract route with it, and just not caring or knowing enough to be easily interpreted when relaying your point. In that respect I understand someone’s reticence to allow the comment, however I would post it, and explain that I did not know what the hell they were on about and would they like to start again, know where they went wrong, or just shut the door quietly on the way out  – finds this highly amusing. Picasso could draw perfectly well, his abstract work was all about looking beyond the mundane, the normal, experimenting, and although I don’t particularly like his abstract work (just using him as an example see?) I enjoy that in writing terms very much.

4. If someone follows you it is only polite to follow back, in fact it is rude not to – this is absolute and utter poppycock to such a humongous degree that I am not awarding any explanations on the subject. It is clear tommy-rot. If you know not why, then I despair.

5. If someone comments on your blog, (no matter how many times, indeed the more often, the more this rule applies it seems) or leaves a like, you should then go to their blog and like or comment upon theirs and if you don’t, then you are deemed ‘egocentric’. – Now I do visit the blog of every personage after I see they have liked, commented or followed the Cloud, because I feel it only polite to do so and I am  intrigued as to the sort of people who find my words interesting. If they have started to follow me I read their latest post and then read their ‘about’. If I like what I see I leave a like, if I wish to comment I shall do so, and if I think everything I have come across there is naught but a  giant bunch of swinging bollocks I’ll leave without a glance back, without commenting or liking anything. It is my choice, and right  to do so. I appreciate their interest of course, and tell them so if they have commented. I do not expect those I follow to follow me, nor do I demand they comment. Some people hate poetry, and that is fine. They may well hate the Cloud too, there’s no reason to assume everyone will think sonmi and the Cloud to be some kind of cosmic superhero(ine) with magical powers and the capability to raise smiles from an almost dead frown (though they are missing a great deal of quality entertainment and possibly some free gifts like sticky buns or Tupperware sets if they do mind) . None. I do not want any purely etiquette based, or pity follows thank you, if you like it here then stay, if you do not then leave. I’ll hold no grudges because that is exactly what I do myself. I refer you to my previous post on follows and my thoughts upon the subject – To Follow or not to Follow, that is the Question.

6. If you follow a blog you should not hover silently and be neither heard nor seen – In as much as all of us have followers who appear to neither read our blogs nor like, not comment, nor moon or anything. This irritates some people a huge amount. It bothers myself not a jot. Not because all I wish to accrue is ‘bums on seats’, because I do not, I personally prefer quality over quantity and the Cloud’s time is precious I’ll have you know, but rather because I have no idea of their reasons, they may be shy,they may be only after numbers themselves to enlarge their audience and have followed me in the hope I shall so the same, or, they may read everything I have ever written on some rss feed somewhere without my knowing about it and absolutely love it. As I cannot know (because there is no telling as the President and Founder often says), I would be wasting my time being at all bothered about it, and prefer to think of the positive possibilities anyway. So. There you go.

7. You should visit the blogs you follow every time the author displays a new post –  (included in this is the idea of reading their posts solely from email subscriptions or feeds, because they won’t know you have visited and their stats will not increase as mentioned in number six).  – We all have lives outside of the blogosphere, (the Cloud itself barely stops of a day what with all the bickering between squally showers and the many and varied issues with that idiot Jack Frost), and sometimes posts will be missed, and if this happens it is best not to view the whole thing as malice afore-thought, because it will make you appear to be a loon.

8. You should answer every comment left upon your blog – Here I do concur. If someone takes the time to read your words, or look at your photographs/artwork/recipe/instructions on how to make small wooden houses for Gerbils (left in the wilderness for them to inhabit by choice) etc, then it is only polite to thank them. You may not be able to reply instantly, having things to do and people to see. You may well have hundreds, nay thousands of comments left regularly, however still, to eventually reply to them is basic good manners. I follow a blog where my comments are rarely answered before two months have passed. I do not grind my teeth and froth about it. The author always apologise for their tardiness (not at all necessary), and then replies. I have no beef with this (vegan you see). However, if comments left are repeatedly ignored, whilst the blogger is perfectly within their rights to do so, it will ultimately put me off leaving any more. If I am reading Stephen Fry’s blog I would not expect him to answer every comment, but I continue to read because I find the writing so interesting. This applies to WP blogs too, though, if I feel someone has made it clear that they do not particularly wish me to be reading their blog in the first place, or do the same re comments, then comments shall stop. I’ll read anything I so choose that is in a public forum, but will not force the Cloud nor sonmi upon anyone who does not wish it to be so. Sonmi can take a hint buddy.

I have no ill will towards other bloggers, they may blog as they choose without enmity from myself and the Cloud, be they Power Blogger, the type of blogger who only reblogs others people’s posts (those two seem to get a few people’s goats and then brush their coats vigorously), daily diaries, ‘How To’s’, or simply just want a virtual whiteboard to potter on. Do as you wish, as is your right in this virtual world, but be aware I shall not likely be following all the above rules, not many others I have not yet encountered, which may well reduce my number of followers, and to which I give, not one solitary fig.

I’d like to say that sonmi has no rules at all, but that isn’t true. Nor is it possible to say that of anyone because we all have our lines in the sand. Some are just more blurry than others, some are obsessively straight and immovable.

So, the rules here on the Cloud are as follows *has some minion blow a trumpet rather badly;

1. Don’t be a rude, pompous, right-wing, bigoted angry, bad-mannered (more rude really, but these things can’t be empathised enough I feel), mean, selfish egotistical arse whilst here (save all that for your own blog –  laughs heartily -)  nor bad mouth sonmi and the cloud anywhere else, nor plagerise her doings or tell her that you dislike her wittering round these parts, or criticise her in any way shape or form on pain of death.

That’s it.

Still nothing extra to add.

It would be nice to see you in a top hat, cape and spats occasionally, or some other smart attire, maybe on a Saturday evening. (Not obligatory).

If you get sent to the naughty step more than three times you’re out. (Deadly serious about this).

That’s it, done, no more, the end.

FIN.

ps – Thank you to all my followers, who ever you may be, whether here for the long haul, or just passing through, and all who have commented or clicked that ‘like’ button too at some point. It is hugely appreciated, positive feedback inspires and helps the Cloud fly so high. I do like you all very much, (apart from the miscreant who spray painted some male genitalia upon the side of the Cloud and then turned it into a face, you shall be dealt with when my investigations are complete I assure you).