"I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde." - Dolly Parton, I was stealing things in the supermarket today while balanced on the shoulders of vampires. I was charged with shoplifting on three counts., I'm a picker I'm a grinner I'm a lover And I'm a sinner, So I went to buy a watch and the man in the shop said "Analogue." I said "No just a watch thanks.", Some people call me the space cowboy Some call me the gangster of love Some people call me Maurice Cause I speak of the pompitous of love
Hariod asked me to tell a joke yesterday evening and then gave me one back in reply, so I thought I would tell you said jokes – mine being the Cloud’s favourite of all time. The Cloud is not a laugh a minute at times, but something in there was tickled.
Now, before I continue I am going to ask my fellow bloggerati out there to post their favourite joke in the comments box below. If you hate jokes then pull a funny face instead. I am rather easily pleased at times. Actually, a good quote on jokes will also suffice. But I’d prefer a joke, and if you pull a face then pictorial evidence must be supplied, so don’t take the easy road out. If you are about to tell me that you don’t know any jokes, I must point out that you are on the internet, and can access a trillion at any given point in time. You have to work for your smiles here on the cloud you know *cracks a whip a few times.
The jokes can be as risqué as you like, there’s no censor for sauce on the Cloud (the most common sauce to be found in the Cloud galley kitchen is tomato ketchup. In some strange foreign lands this is also known as ketsup, or catsip or something. Brown sauce has it charm, but ultimately the red condiment always wins in a fight to the death).
Here is Hariod’s offering, a fine choice whether you know of it already or not;
‘A man walks into the doctors and says “Doctor I’ve got this steering wheel lodged in my groin.”
The doctor says “How on earth did this happen?”
The man replies “I don’t know, but it’s driving me nuts” ‘
And here is the Cloud and sonmi’s primary choice;
‘A man walks into the doctors and says “Doctor I’ve got a strange growth in an embarrassing place. Can you have a look?”
The Doctor asks the man to show him where the growth is, and the man lowers his trousers and underwear and bends over to show a small green leaf sticking out of his bum hole.
The man says “Can you help me Doctor?”
The doctor replies “I have some bad news sir, this is only the tip of the iceberg.”
As I said to Hariod, there’s every chance the fact that I grow iceberg lettuces in the Cloud’s garden may have influenced my merriment.
Don’t let me down.